Tuesday, August 17, 2004

piglets, ferris wheels, and junk food

It's that time again: the Toronto Exhibition, or The Ex. For those of you who live outside of Canada, it's basically a giant 4-H fair in the city.

For most adults, this is a place you avoid at all costs. A place filled with screaming kids, sticky, rickety rides, and asphalt for miles. For most adults, only the mantra of "Can we go? Can we go? Can we go?" by their kids can persuade them to develop enough of a resolve to deal with the crowds. Not me, though. I am one of those insane, childless people who LOVE fairs!

I love everything about the Ex (well, except for the fact that a lot of the animals I cheese over will end up on a plate). I love all the junk food. I love the smelly horse barn. I love the old women and their macrame crafts. I even enjoy the occasional kiddy ride which will inevitably leave me green and with whip lash.

My poor husband has agreed to go with me again. He is a trooper.

I am especially excited to see that the Village People are taking the stage this year. I hesitate to think about what chaos will ensue when a bunch of drunken, green, junkfood-filled fair-goers try to emulate the choreography.

The RCMP ("Mounties" for you foreigners) will also be performing. I hope they don't get confused with the Village People. If you see a poor dancer in a stiff red ensemble, please point him to the correct venue.

I am especially saddened by the fact that we won't see the cat show this year. If you have seen Best in Show, you have some idea of the spectacle. It seems that one has to be a very big, older woman with Doris Day hair, or a skinny, attractive gay man to participate.

All in all, it's well worth the $100 you will likely spend on winning a big ugly stuffed bear.

Ah...The Ex, making big kids happy since 1879


Blogger Terry said...

I miss the Ex! Be sure and post pictures will ya?

11:17 AM  
Blogger aleah said...

You bet!!

11:25 AM  
Blogger zombieswan said...

I like fairs, but I DON'T like getting green & pukey on the rides. Urk. I used to feel sorry for my mom for not going on rides. But now that I'm older, I understand that there was a reason she didn't want to do it. :) I'll just hold your cheesy stuffed teddy bear for you and drink this here lemonade (hopefully it's frozen lemonade. mmmmmmm). You can wave at me as you go by.

8:41 AM  
Blogger aleah said...

Yeah, last year Rick and I were waxing romantic about our younger years at carnivals. We'd always ride all the rides (without question) and were likely drunk at the time. After a lot of "big talk" about what we used to do, we decided to ride one of those vomit-inducers. Unlike our younger, drunker years, however, we left the ride feeling like our stomachs had stayed behind (somewhere back at the first major twirl). This year, if we ride anything at all, it will probably be something along the lines of the ferris wheel.

9:04 AM  

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