Monday, October 31, 2005

Instructions for Aging

I don't want to live in a nursing home
or smell like cheese.
When my friends start to drop,
weighted bullets,
don't tell me you understand -
You won't.

Our sons and daughters will
make an appeal
out of misery
or guilt -
Ignore them.

Don't tell me Shatner
aged so well.
The bastard.

When I am ninety,
I'd prefer not to go dancing
in rubber pants
concealing my

bring me
a package of day old doughnuts,
plenty of old newspapers
for my

When I’m old,
there's no way
I’m going to celebrate.
I'll refuse to wear purple
or teach the young
what life is like
when you're
already gone.

Saturday, October 22, 2005

Long week

This week has been exhausting and fantastic. I really like my new job a lot, and have enjoyed the office culture. I thought it would be an adjustment for me, getting used to being social and conversing with so many people in a given day, but I find it's helping me stay positive.

Life is tough at home - lots of financial considerations and illnesses and homesick-ness. I am hoping I can make a trip down to see the family in Indiana soon. As it stand, it probably won't happen before the holidays.

I am redoing my blogroll, so if you don't see your name and are offended, please let me know. I think a few of you got lost in the shuffle.

Wednesday, October 12, 2005

More stuff to boggle the mind

This week has been insane. Trying to prepare for the new job and hire someone to take my place - it's been exhausting and emotional.

I did touch base with the extraordinary Muay Thai master, Kru Darwin today. Yea! One step closing to getting my ass kicked.

I am also getting ready to meet another web person via the Journal. Meeting people online is a gamble. But, I suppose if I met a person as kind and balanced as my husband online, a few rolls of the dice with friends is a good bet.

I did meet Kereena and udge and Dave, after all. And they rock of course. :-)

Friday, October 07, 2005


Don't talk. I'm shivering. Let the moment pass
without a word opening fast,
killing our thoughts.
This is the quiet
I spoke of.
You threw away the letters
I wrote
during the war.
You said you could not bear them.
Don't talk now.
The details were all there.
You fault me for pouring
my soul on paper.
You were afraid your mother would open
and know our secret.
On this mountain
there are too many secrets.
Creatures make their way
around our house
in the pitch black.
You can hear them sniffing.
You blame the letters
disappearing on a mischievous
The evidence of paw prints
and bags of flour
I know you wish I had not said what I did.
Your family would kill for less.
The wine is heavy in me
and the fields wait for the plough.
Don't talk unless you are prepared
to say it...
you want me.
There is nothing beyond the bend.
And you want only

Thursday, October 06, 2005


I walked home last night and started to notice all of the changing leaves. This time of year makes me a little melancholy. I suppose it has a similar effect on others. Seasonal Affective Disorder doesn't fully explain the feeling - as it is a more complicated process, probably deeply rooted in our ancestral psyche. The change in the seasons really grounds everyone - and brings to mind our own physical and emotional changes.

Our house is very empty right now. We had been borrowing a friend's furniture over the past few months while she was in Europe and needed a place to store large items. The time passed quickly, needless to say, and now we are without furniture in a lot of rooms. Most of the major needs are taken care of, and we can't bring ourselves to justify purchasing new furniture to suit our current location because we might downsize. Finding an affordable home larger than or even equal to the one we have now is tough. I suspect we won't have use for tons of large furniture in the next two-five years.

That's the strange state of our living arrangement. I feel like I am occupying a place that is not my own, like a hostel or something. Very weird.

I am anxious to start the new job, although a bittersweet feeling lingers at the business. The change goes along with the weather.

On the upside, Halloween is approaching, my favorite holiday! I hope to have lots of goblins show up this year, and I likely will since I am on a fairly busy street.

Wednesday, October 05, 2005

Something sickening this way comes

I don't usually report on celebrities because they suck. But does anyone else get a knot in their stomach thinking about poor little Katie Holmes carrying the genetic material of Tom "Beam Me Up" Cruise. Shivers ensue.....


Not until I get a weddin' ring, Junior

Yikes!! Indiana Republicans have done it again with the introduction of a bill that requires unwed persons to submit an application before getting pregnant.


Tuesday, October 04, 2005

Ontario's zoos

WSPA recently put out another report on the state of Ontario's zoos. In my opinion, the report is too generous, but certainly eye opening regarding the poor conditions.

I have been to some of those mentioned and was appalled by the sparse and cramped conditions.

Ontario zoos failing the grade